One Hot Desert Night Read online

  At least now she had names to go with his family, and a strong sense of sympathy for his plight. “I can’t imagine what you’ve had to endure, but I do hope that someday you’ll try to be happy.”

  He kept pacing liked a caged cougar, as if he couldn’t physically stand still without succumbing to the sorrow. He also avoided looking at her. “I cannot be happy until I avenge my family’s deaths by destroying their killer.”

  “And if that happens, will you truly be content knowing you exchanged one life for another?”

  “Four lives,” he said adamantly as he turned toward her. “I will achieve some semblance of atonement for my transgressions. Had it not been for my duty, they would still be alive.”

  She pushed off the stone pillar and stood before him. “But you still have no idea who might be responsible.”

  “I have followed several leads, but all have been dead ends. I still have more to investigate, including enemies of my father.”

  Evidently, he was into self-torture. “Then you’re saying this tragedy could have resulted from your father’s connections, and you might not be responsible at all?”

  He dropped his arms to his sides and looked defiant. “That possibility is remote at best. Regardless, I moved Lira and Layth to this remote location to protect them. I failed in that endeavor and by virtue of the fact I should have been there that night. My covert activities prevented me from achieving that goal.”

  “And if you’d been there, you would be dead, too.”

  “In the beginning I wished that very thing. My mission aided me in moving forward.”

  “You’re not moving forward, Rayad. You’re caught in a prison comprised of guilt and hatred.”

  His expression went stone cold. “Have you not wished ill will on your captors?”

  “As a matter of fact, I have. I’ve fantasized about tying my abductor up in a heavy blanket and beating him with a baseball bat. My therapist said that was healthy, as long as I didn’t act on it. I thought that was kind of humorous since I can’t harm a phantom.”

  “And you have never desired to know his identity?”

  “What would be the point? It’s done, and it’s over. The experience has made me more cautious and maybe a little fearful. But I’m determined to get over that rather than let the experience stifle me. Believe it or not, you helped me to see the importance in regaining my life. I’m sorry you can’t seem to regain yours.”

  He turned his attention back to the monument of destruction. “We should return to the palace now. And again I remind you not to mention this to anyone. Very few people know about my past.”

  “Does that include my sister?”

  “Yes. Adan is bound to his promise to me not to speak of it with anyone, including his wife.”

  “Don’t worry,” she said. “Your secrets are all safe with me. Good luck carrying them to your grave.”

  As she walked away, Sunny realized all too well that nothing she said to Rayad would ever break through his resolve to remain static in his life. If he chose to remain immersed in his grief and his search for retaliation, so be it.

  He could never be the man for her, and that made her incredibly sad. Even worse, he would never let himself love again, and she couldn’t save him from that fate. She wouldn’t even try.

  * * *

  “Well?”

  After a silent drive to the palace, and an uncomfortable family dinner, Sunny had retired to her suite to unpack and get some sleep. That plan had been thwarted by her sister, who now hovered over her like a mother hen. “Well what, Piper?”

  “Did you enjoy your time with Rayad?”

  Until today, she could confirm that had been the case. “It was nice while it lasted.”

  Piper sent her a suspicious look. “Did the two of you...you know.”

  Unfortunately, she did know what her twin was intimating and decided to throw her a bone. “Yes, we did you know. Several times. Are you happy now?”

  “Question is, Sunny, are you happy? I’m thinking the answer is no.”

  She tossed the last of her clothes onto the bureau and her tote in a nearby chair. “Look, we had a good time, it was great, but it’s over. End of story.”

  Piper perched on the edge of the mattress and stared like a hawk scoping out its prey. “If he did something to hurt you, tell me, and I’ll have Adan deal with him.”

  Sunny shoved the bag aside and practically collapsed into the chair. “He didn’t do anything to hurt me, so I don’t need you to ask your husband to beat him up. We’re both adults, and we knew whatever transpired was only temporary. Now if you don’t mind, it’s late, and I’d like to get to bed.”

  Her sister put on a stellar pout and pushed up from the bed. “Okay. I know when I’m not wanted. But I want all the dirty details before you leave in two weeks, even if I have to force you to talk.”

  As much as she hated to drop a bad news bomb, Sunny felt she had no choice. “On that subject,” she began as she stood, “I’m probably going to leave in a couple of days. I’m ready to get back to work.”

  “We’ve barely had time to talk, Sunny. Won’t you reconsider staying at least a week?”

  She might if she didn’t have to face Rayad on a daily basis. Then again, he could be leaving shortly to return to his mission of death and destruction. “I’ll think about it as soon as I get a good night’s sleep.”

  Piper came to her feet. “Fine. I’ll leave as soon as you answer one more question.”

  Great. Just great. “Make it quick.”

  “Where exactly did you stay?”

  In a mystical cavern in the company of a mysterious, tortured, gorgeous man. “Some primitive place near a small village.”

  “No room service?”

  She’d been serviced, and often. “Definitely not. There was only one bed, but it was decent.”

  “I’m surprised you even noticed the bed when you had a hunk occupying it with you. If he’s anything like Adan, you didn’t even need a bed.”

  With that, Piper grinned and rushed out of the room before Sunny could launch a verbal retaliation.

  Weary and worn out, Sunny took her second shower of the day, brushed her teeth and hair, dressed in her favorite blue silk sleep shirt and slipped beneath the covers. Her mind wouldn’t seem to shut off and allow her to sleep, so she turned on the bedside lamp and attempted to read the mystery novel she’d brought with her. She couldn’t concentrate, thanks to the mental slideshow featuring wonderful moments with Rayad. At times the recollections caused her face to flush, and other memories made her heartsick. At least an hour passed before she finally gave in to the lure of sleep.

  “I need you...”

  Sunny came awake with a start, at first believing she’d been dreaming. But as her vision came into focus, she saw her dream man standing next to the bed, dressed in only a pair of navy pajama bottoms. “What are you doing here?”

  “I need to be next to you one last night, though I know I do not deserve it.”

  He looked so lost and forlorn, she scooted over and lifted the covers. “Okay, but just so you know, we’re only going to sleep.”

  “I understand,” he said as he slid into the bed beside her.

  As he stacked his hands behind his head, she rolled to her side to face him. “Too much on your mind to rest?” she asked, breaking the silence.

  “Yes.”

  “I had the same problem. I’d just drifted off right before you arrived.”

  “My apologies for waking you.” He sent her a fast glance before going back to inspecting the ceiling. “If you wish me to leave, I will do so.”

  “I wish you would talk to me, Rayad. Let me in, and let me know what you’re thinking.”

  He exhaled a rough sigh. “It would be too difficult.”

/>   “It would be cathartic.”

  When he failed to respond, Sunny assumed he was bent on ignoring her suggestion. Then suddenly he said, “My code name is Lion.”

  She hadn’t expected that revelation. “Okay. Why are you telling me this now?”

  “Layth means lion. I took it in honor of my son.”

  She inched closer to his side, drawn to his undeniable grief. “Did the name suit him as well as it does you?”

  His ensuing smile looked so very sad. “It did. He was a very brave boy. Highly intelligent. Always in motion and into trouble at times. Yet he had a very caring side to him. He inherited that from his mother.”

  “He inherited some of that from you.”

  The comment drew his gaze. “How can you believe that when you know who I am and what I am capable of doing?”

  She wanted to scream from frustration. “It’s not fundamentally who you are, Rayad. It’s a bitter force that drives you to try to be that man. You’ll never be able to succeed because believe it or not, there’s still too much good in you.”

  “I am beyond redemption,” he said as he reached over and snapped off the light.

  Against better judgment, Sunny settled her cheek on his chest. “You’re so very wrong. It’s obvious you loved your wife, and I suspect she loved you, too.”

  “You are correct. I loved her the first time I set eyes on her.”

  On one hand, Sunny wasn’t sure she wanted to know all the details. On the other, she had the opportunity to finally glimpse the real man behind the steely exterior. “When did the two of you meet?”

  “The night our fathers announced our betrothal.”

  Incredible. An arranged marriage that had gone right, until fate took a wrong turn. “How old were you when you married?”

  “I was nineteen, and she had barely turned eighteen. Layth was born two years later. That was the most monumental day of my life.” He paused and drew in a breath before continuing. “I remember how it felt the first time I held my son in my arms. I recall his first smile and the day he took his first steps when I returned from a month-long mission. For many years I have rejected those memories, but lately I cannot.”

  “You shouldn’t deny them, Rayad. Letting yourself remember will help you finally heal.”

  “The loss has left a wound in my soul that will never heal.”

  “Have you ever cried for them?” she asked.

  “No. I feared if I did, I would never stop. No man should live long enough to bury his beloved wife and child.”

  The slight break in his voice made Sunny want to cry for him. Instead, she moved closer and held him tighter. They stayed that way for a long time, until Rayad pulled her to him and kissed her with all the passion she had come to know in his arms. Before long, they were naked and touching each other without restraint. And when it came time to consummate their temporary, troubled union one final time, Sunny let go of her own fears and pulled him on top of her. She relished his weight, the closeness of his powerful body as he moved inside her. She welcomed her climax and loved the way he said her name when he found his own release. She loved him, period, with all her heart and soul.

  In the aftermath, Rayad was so still, she thought he’d fallen asleep. But then he shifted back beside her, draped his arm across her abdomen and laid his cheek against her shoulder. That’s when she felt the dampness on her flesh. That’s when she knew he had finally given in to the tears that were long overdue. That’s when she started to hope that maybe, just maybe, the healing had truly begun.

  * * *

  “Wake up, Sunshine. It’s happening!”

  Sunny pried her eyes open, glanced at Piper then remembered Rayad’s late-night visit. She turned her head to see only an empty space beside her, and for once she appreciated his habit of sneaking off without waking her.

  She sat up against the headboard and yawned. “Okay, Pookie. What’s got your drawers in a wad this morning?”

  “Maysa’s in labor. Actually, she’s been in labor all night. The doctor says it should be any time now.”

  “Why aren’t you at the hospital?”

  Piper rolled her eyes. “She’s not in the hospital. She’s in her suite. Apparently, tradition dictates that a future king is born at the palace, barring any emergency.”

  Of all the archaic practices, this had to top the list. “What if she has to have a C-section?”

  Piper plopped down on the end of the bed. “According to Rafiq, they’ve prepared for that and have a makeshift operating room set up in the basement and an ambulance standing by. But it looks like she’s going to deliver without any problems.”

  Sunny threw the covers aside, thankful she’d put on a T-shirt last night, and that she didn’t find any obvious evidence of Rayad’s presence. “I’ll take a quick shower and join you.”

  “Meet me upstairs in the family sitting room,” Piper said on her way to the door. “But hurry. I want you to be there when they bring the baby out. No one knows if it’s a boy or a girl.”

  “I bet it’s one or the other,” Sunny called to her sister, but the snide comment clearly feel on deaf ears.

  As much as she liked Rafiq and Maysa, she wasn’t in the mood to celebrate a birth. But the prospect of seeing Rayad again drove her from the bed to complete her morning routine. Provided he actually showed up.

  * * *

  He did not want to be there, yet family loyalty overrode his wants and desires. He had been watching the clock for well over an hour, when he had not been thinking about his night with Sunny.

  As if those memories had come to life, she appeared in the doorway, dressed in the flowing blue caftan he had purchased for her in the village and a pair of gold sandals. She looked as beautiful as she had the first time he had seen her standing beneath the palace portico. Her blond hair curled around her slender shoulders, bringing to mind the times he had kissed her there. He took a visual journey across her face, his gaze coming to rest on her lips to find her smile was absent. He was to blame for that, as well as the sadness in her eyes.

  Following the lead of the rest of the men present in the room, Rayad came to his feet, battling the urge to go to her and kiss her soundly. For that reason, he thought it best to avoid her at all costs.

  As unwelcome fate would have it, she crossed the room and claimed the chair next to his. “Did you finally get some sleep?” she asked with a smile.

  “Some,” he muttered. “And you?”

  “Same here. Are you okay?”

  He recognized the referral to his emotional breakdown, a subject he did not wish to broach. “I am ready to return to my duties.”

  “Of course you are.”

  The venom in her tone filled him with regret, and the wish that he could be the man who would grant her every desire. An impossible undertaking.

  When the conversation ceased, Rayad grabbed a magazine from the side table and pretended to read. The room remained abuzz with speculation over the child’s gender, creating an atmosphere that hindered his concentration. Having Sunny so close did not help his predicament, either.

  If only he could find an excuse to leave before the birth, yet that would be too obvious. If only the queen would get on with it.

  “Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please.”

  Rayad glanced up from the magazine to see the balding, bespectacled Deeb, the palace’s executive assistant, standing in the entry. The man cleared his throat twice before he garnered everyone’s attention.

  “It is with great pride, and the parents’ blessing, that I present to you Bajul’s newest royal son, Prince Ahmed ibn Rafiq Mehdi.”

  A son. Rayad froze the moment Rafiq walked into the room, the infant cradled in his arms. All the memories he had tried so mightily to keep at bay came rushing in on him. The crowd gathered
around the newborn thwarted any escape, and he realized Sunny was at the forefront of the celebration.

  “May I hold him?” he heard her ask, and Rafiq granted her request, though Rayad found that odd since she was not a blood relative.

  He also found it odd that she seemed to be approaching him, her gaze unwavering. He was completely astonished when she arrived and handed him the child. “This is what it’s all about, Rayad. This new baby is a sign that life does go on even during the darkest of times.”

  He looked down on the sleeping child and remembered, not with bitterness and regret, but with wonder. He silently welcomed this boy into the world and prayed that no harm would ever come to him. Yet when the pain of remembrance became too great, he intended to hand him back to Sunny, and found her gone.

  And there he stood, holding a child that was not his, and with little hope of ever having another.

  Ten

  Sunny wasn’t surprised when Rayad stormed into the suite, primed for a confrontation. That had been her plan all along. A chance to implement Sunny’s Last Stand.

  “You had no right or cause to put me through such agony,” he said, his voice teeming with fury.

  She kept right on packing her toiletries, as if he’d told her he appreciated the gesture. “Like it or not, you needed a wake-up call.”

  He strode across the room and stood at the foot of the bed, hands fisted at his sides like he wanted to throw a punch. “That is not for you to decide.”

  She afforded him only a brief glance before resuming her preparation for departure. “Someone had to do it, Rayad, and it might as well be me.”

  “I resent your intrusion.”

  After zipping the carry-on, she calmly picked it up from the bench and then set it on the floor with the larger bag. Only then did she give him her full attention. “As of tomorrow, I’ll be out of here and out of your life for good.”

  “Where are you going?”

  Funny, he sounded almost disappointed. “Back to Atlanta then back to work.”

  “Why so soon?”

  “I’d think that would be obvious. This palace isn’t big enough for the both of us. As long as you’re here, I can’t get over you, and that is unacceptable. But before I go, I have a few things I need to say.”